Spook 9 — Hallodrinks

Much like the infamous rule 34, I subscribe to the belief that if it happens, there is an alcohol designed to drink while it happens (including some overlap with the aformentioned rule 34 I’m sure).

Halloween is no different, and today I break down what it is that makes a drink “Halloween Enough” to be considered a Hallodrink.

 

Not to be confused with sad “Hollow Bottles”

 

So let’s get crackin. To me  there seems to be three main criteria for being a Hallodrink:

  1. A “scary” label
  2. Flavors including either cloves or pumpkins
  3. A terrible punny name

 

Let’s start with the scary label. This is a fairly normal, every day wine:

 

That hand is reaching for your liver

 

Now, Sinister hand is a brand that I can buy any time of the year (well theoretically–at over$20/bottle I’llstick to yellowtail). However during October it suddenly becomes spooky and timely! Look at that blood–how mysterious! Is it the hand of some hideous monster? A noble knight come back to this world to save the maiden whom he could not in life? A fairly mundane severed hand with an ailing Medieval Times worker just offscreen?

 

“We’d offer him real medical service, but that’s not period so… mead it is!”

 

Second on the list is about flavors. So let’s take a list at something random like… Sam Adam’s Oktoberfest.

 

Whipped cream for one…

 

Well the ingredients in Octoberfest are: mostly different kinds of malts, so that really doesn’t prove my point. But i bet that sauce on TOP is pumpkin! Eh? Ehh????

But since that didn’t work, how about this list of seasonal beers?

  • Blue Moon Pumpkin Ale
  • Woodchuck Pumpkin Cider
  • Hallowine
  • Pumking Pumpkin Ale
  • …more pumpkin Ales

Awww yeah. That’s proof using science.

 

“By the Hairs of Zeus, he’s right!”

Finally we get to the part about funny names. Of course, I think my list already covered a handful, but I assure you there are many more. Many play the pun card. Some just put Halloween in the name. And others… others go for the gold.

 

Hopefully they don’t use a similar gimmick as Goldschlager…

 

 

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